I did not know how to speak the truth in love. I could not provide that healing place, and I’ll regret it forever. I don’t blame my sister for running away her wounds ran deep, and she needed to go somewhere that offered acceptance and time to heal. If I could go back and sit on the arm of the wingback chair during one of our pivotal conversations-like a ghost of Rachel future-I know I’d put my hand over my mouth and tell myself to listen. More than a bull in my sister’s emotional china shop, I spiritually kicked her after she’d fallen to the ground by trying to argue instead of trying to understand. I focused so intently on arguing the points of the Bible regarding sins against the body, homosexuality and sexual promiscuity that I hurt my sister early and often. If I could have done anything different with my sister, I would have shut my mouth. You can maintain your position and love your sister. I wish someone had said: “You do not need to sacrifice righteousness to continue a relationship. I would have taken the information from classes, the pulpit, weekend seminars … anywhere. I did the best I could, but I wish my church had equipped me to share the truth in love at a practical level. What does it actually look like in everyday life to love and follow God and to continue to love those who reject his ways?
